renegading monster

(Source: paramoreandstuff)

heyfunniest:

Laughter provides a good workout for the heart, so click here and laugh!!

(Source: niknak79)

(Source: aliibum)

(Source: did-yuo-kno)

timethatswasted-:

stormageddon-pond:

knittedfuin:

plenilune:

tehriz | dduane:

The best Amazon reviews possibly ever: Buyers review the Bic Pen.

My favorite:

Worked fine with my right hand, but when I came to use my left hand my writing came out looking like the work of a complete imbecile. I can only assume Bic have created a right-handed only pen, and would caution left-handers to “try before you buy”.

“While this pen is functional and easy to use, a downside is it only supports one default font (that appears to be user specific?). I have tried multiple times to access Helvetica, Times New Roman, Impact etc. to no avail… I don’t even see any input buttons.
The default font is pretty shoddy looking, resembling Comic Sans.
An update would be appreciated Bic!”

“This pen has been a wonderful investment. Previously I used to write ransom notes in my own blood, but the constant fainting meant all my kidnap victims got away. And cutting letters out of newspapers was useless because there were never enough zeros. But now with one of these little beauties to demand money, my dungeon is far tidier and I’m making out like a Somali pirate.”

xD. wtf is this trolling goldmine

THE FANDOM HAS HIT THE REVIEWS.

“I found this pen to be an excellent addition to my arsenal after a stint in the arena this year. I had been injured after a huge bear-like creature had slashed at my leg earlier in the day. I had climbed a tree for safety, and after many hours the bear eventually dissappeared. I guess it went and killed another tribute as later on that night the girl from 9 was killed.

There were two roaming groups of alliances; the careers and a group of underdogs from the outlying districts. Both were close to my location, as I was in a mountain pass with only two exits. Both groups were camping at either end of the valley. The mountains were unforgiving and I knew with the gash on my leg I would never make it. However, I had to try something so I decided to try and escape by floating down the river than ran through the gorge.

No sooner had I begun my decent down the tree, when my weak leg gave way and I crashed to the ground. Fresh wounds opened up, contimated with dirt. One of the nearer groups, the underdogs from 10, 11 and 12, were not too far off in the distance. They would see me. I took a step forward and howled in pain as blood erupted from my wounds. the underdogs heard the sound and sprinted along the narrow path that followed the river, towards my position. I wouldn’t make the river in time. I slipped down the bank, and was seconds from being seen. I curled up into a ball underneath a part where the bank overhung the river. if i tried to swim, they would see me and kill me. Luckily, they passed by. I waited til they had gone, then looked across the river. “Please” I mouthed, hoping my sponsors were watching. My luck was in as later that night a package came down by parachute. I opened it up eagerly, expecting weapons or medicine. In fact, it was a Bic crystal pen.

I set to work with it. The nib was surprisingly good at getting the dirt out of my wounds. I tied grass together, then used the pen as a needle to sew the rips in my cothes back together. Then I used the pen to draw camoflauge on my face. I was ready to escape. Later that night, several cannons sounded. It seemed the two groups of tributes had met, and fought. only one career was left. Under the cover of darkness, I used the pen to fell a tree. Then I carved the tree into a canoe, with the pen. And used the pen as a paddle to go downstream.

Eventually, I reached the cornocopia. This is where the tribute would be. And she was. From district 1, she was coated in blood. I staggered from the canoe, dragging it up the bank. I slung off my rucksack. She stood there, watching me. Then I unclenched my fist and revealed the bic in my hand. Her eyes widened. She knew the inevitable was coming. I drew back my hand and let fly. The bic flew straight and true, into her eye and instantly ending her life. the cannon boomed.

In addition, the bic came really helpful with doing all of the post-games publicity work, such as autographs etc. I’d fully reccommend this to any tribute entering the arena.”

I ordered 300 of these individually gift wrapped for a client’s wedding and was horrified to learn 14 minutes before the reception that this is NOT REAL CRYSTAL!!! From an arms length and after 3 stoli martinis this could easily pass for Ireland’s finest leaded or even a clear quartz from the mines of Malay but one look under the jewelers glass and it was immediately apparent that Bic was using low grade plastique. I will give their craftsmen due credit for their obvious mastery with the grinding and polishing wheels, as i’ve rarely encountered such precision in a “cigarette cut” piece. But crystal? Snort! I THINK NOT!

(Source: fightytime)